Parenting on Purpose

It has been a month since our little girl left us. Image stills from the past month remain vivid in my mind's eye. After all, how do we deal with the sea of emotions that continues to engulf us at the ebb and flow of each tide? It was a familiar sight each morning to wake up to her gentle calls. Alas those days are over, and we wake up each morning to an empty cot, a tangible reminder that she is no longer in our lives. This blog post serves as a diary recalling all that has happened since the last week before she left, and it records the raw emotions imprinted upon our hearts: One week more. She returns to us after a visit to her birth family for one last time before our final parting. It's been almost a week since she last left us, and our lives have gone on as if she had never come. But beneath the veneer of normalcy, there is still an aching pain; a certain sadness about the finality of the parting. I really do not know what to expect for the upcoming week; ho...

On Wednesday night, we found our pet praying mantis lying still, in its cage. It had died, and my younger son and I particularly grieved the loss of our new pet. Then I dropped a bottle of medicine and cut myself while picking up the shards of glass. The visual reminder triggered by the crimson fluid brought to mind that Good Friday was approaching. His blood shed for us by His death on the Cross. Thursday morning, we met with the relevant case managers and were told that the time had come for our baby girl to return to her birth family. This is the baby we have known since she was 2-months-old. She turns 1-year-old next month. We have fought hard for her in the times we felt that others were not doing so; we have played, fed, comforted, giggled with, sang to, bathed, and done all the things parents would do for a young child. We have seen her through the many adjustments and sleepless nights she has had to make in being shuttled from one caregiver to another. During her ...

50.39 seconds. The (less than) one minute of time that made history for the small island nation of Singapore. Millions in Singapore and around the world watched as 21-year-old Joseph Schooling defeated his long-time idol and heavily-decorated Olympian Michael Phelps, the man described as "the most-decorated Olympian of all time". Indeed most of the international news footage had been previously focussed on Phelps, given that the American is expected to retire at this year's Rio Olympics. The New York Times even ran an article with the headline: " Somebody (His Name’s Joseph Schooling) Finally Beats Michael Phelps"! For Joseph Schooling, it could not have been a prouder moment, as he not only bagged Singapore's first and only Olympic Gold, it was also a race that proved he had not only matched, but also beaten his childhood idol. Indeed a 2008 photograph of 13-year-old Schooling standing side by side with Michael Phelps has been spreading like wildfire o...

"My mother is the wind; my father is the frost," says the Snow Child, as she dances into the lives of a childless couple living at the edge of a deep dark forest. Hungry with the longing and desire for a child, and in pain from years of continuous criticism from the other villagers, the couple desperately welcomes the Snow Child into their lives, and they yearn for her to find a home in their family. But the Snow Child insists she is different from the Other Children, and persists in behaviours peculiar to the village as a whole. What happens when she wanders off back into the wild? Will there ever be love and warmth in the home once again? UK-based tutti frutti productions presents an enchanting tale of love and hope. Written by Emma Reeves, the 2016 KidsFest play was a delight for the children, who warmed up to the Snow Child the moment she appeared on stage. "Is she real?" they chorused, as the girl seemed to come alive and wear the winter clothing of her ne...

We have had a messy week. A small taste of what it must have been like to be Israelites in the wilderness, wandering around with our two kids in tow. Yet so grateful for our families and how they have opened up their homes for us and the boys to stay in these few nights, when the unbearable hum of electric drills and constant banging on concrete above and below have become something we had to flee from. The home upgrading scheme, this we could plan ahead for, schedule; and yet, when we finally had to execute our plans, life happened.  Though a man may plan his steps,  it is the Lord who governs them... Seeking an oasis in the deserts of life. And so it was, on Tuesday, at the end of a fulfilling session of work, that I received a call from my mother-in-law. A terrible accident with the boys,  she said. A mother's heart can get buried in an instant. It can fall from heights so high into abysses previously unknown.  Which is I suppose a good thing, as e...

Quote of the Day: Just the other day I happened to meet a friend from days gone by. We were talking about the time that I used to spend working with young people in church. To my surprise, I realised that  it has been 17 years! Looking back, I am indeed thankful for the opportunity to impact the hundreds of lives I have come into close proximity with - some for just a season, while others for more than 10 years. I think with fondness of the young people who thrive almost instantly in my classes - for instance the students who participate wholeheartedly in the debates and mock parliamentary and campaign sessions. It always brings me much delight every time a student enjoys my lessons and strives to do his or her best in class.  Then there are the youths who don't seem to perform in their studies no matter how much you try. But you just persist in what you do, and continue to build into their lives day after day. Then an opportunity arises, and you sit down with t...

How do you teach a young child the meaning of "National Day"? How do you even begin to help them understand the concept of what makes a "nation" in the first place?  Even concepts like "country", "history" and "culture" are alien to the mind of a 4-year-old. How then do we begin the mammoth task of helping our children develop a sense of national consciousness that eventually translates to some semblance of national belonging and identity? As an educator, I've developed a technique of helping children learn by using tangible concepts they can identify with. We then take things one step further by introducing new elements, reinforcing these concepts through various pedagogical tools.  To help 4-year-old Z learn about Singapore's National Day, we decided to teach him about one of the country's national icons - the Merlion. While the origins of this national symbol is shrouded in legend, at least it incorporates a ta...