Parenting on Purpose

The little boy turned his head in astonishment; everyone was calling his name and singing in great joy. These were the uncles and aunties he had met on a regular basis, and all of them looked so happy as they raised their voices in merriment. In addition, there were his Daddy and Mummy, and his two Kor Kors, all beaming in wide smiles, as they sang his birthday song and enjoyed the delectable cake that Mummy had baked. Our dear foster son B turned 2 last week. This was the first birthday he was celebrating with us and the friends who love him. That day, as we headed home after all the festivities, we asked little B if he was happy, and the little boy answered resolutely in a gentle voice, “Happy.” This 2-year-old is surrounded by so much love. He is loved by the uncles and aunties and the Kor Kors and Jie Jies who see him on a regular basis. And he brings much joy to others wherever he goes. B first came to live in our home in May 2022. We first met him in a fast-food outlet, after bei...

December 29, 2007. On that day, 15 years ago, I made the following vow: "I Mark Lim, take you, Sue Tan, to be my lawful wedded wife. To have and to hold from this day forward. For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part. According to God's holy ordinances, and here thereto, I pledge you my faithfulness." When I made my marriage vows 15 years ago, I didn't fully understand every aspect of these words. Well, I definitely believed in everything I said, and I was determined to keep those vows, but I didn't fully appreciate the depth of the promises made. Over the past month, I've been reflecting about what these words mean, and I've taken the time to pen down my thoughts. Batam, Indonesia, December 2022. Celebrating our 15th year together. There have been so many ups and downs all these years; and we give thanks to God for keeping us close through it all. To have and to hold. What exactly does this phrase mea...

It's been a total of 5 weeks since Covid left its imprint on our family. For more than 2/1/2 years, our family had been Covid-free, likely due to our semi-geographical isolation in our little corner of Singapore, as well as our general dislike for shopping malls and all things crowded. But on the 2 July, the dotted "T-line" was finally crossed, and I was the first in the family to come down with the virus. I wrote the following words in my Facebook announcement: "Thankful that it's so far been mild; fever over the past two days and an incessant dry cough. And so when I realised it was Day 1 yesterday, I just took it as a matter of fact. What's been hard has been the non-stop work. Teaching continues with or without Covid. Zoom workshops continue. More laboured as I seem to consume a bucket of water for every two hour session. Admin work continues. Still preparing for a major 11-trainer, 55-workshop session next week, with all the client meetings and trainer b...

The much-anticipated moment was at hand. The focus of our attention was just metres away from us; and it seemed like that moment would never come. But it did. And so last week we took the final step of getting our passports checked; and we crossed the land bridge between Singapore and Malaysia for the first time in more than two years. Not a car on the road as we made our first trip to Malaysia in more than two years. I remember the last time we crossed that bridge. It was 19 March 2020, just one day after Malaysia effected its Movement Control Order in a bid to curb the spread of the deadly Covid-19 virus. Ours was the only car on the road, and the usually crowded crossing was devoid of all traffic. It seemed as if a deathly stillness had descended on the area; and we didn't know then that it would be the last time we would be travelling, for what has seemed to feel like a lifetime away. So as we embarked on our travels to Malaysia once again, there was a sense of anticipation and...

Nothing quite sends your emotions into a tailspin than when you hear your son sobbing uncontrollably. And when he tells you that his beloved hamster had just died. That was the scene yesterday evening, after we had just come home from dinner. Sue shares what happened in her Facebook post mourning the loss of our beloved Nibble. "Goodbye, our sweet Nibble. Your passing was too sudden - we had just gone to the vet yesterday and started you on a new course of meds for your ringworm and skin abscesses. Poor E burst into heart wrenching sobs when he found you lying still when we came home. I had already been concerned for the past few months because you were losing weight and spending more time sleeping, though we knew you were in your senior years for a hamster. Nothing prepares you for the loss of a pet and as parents it is doubly hard watching your child go through the grief. " This is a picture of how Nibble will remain in our memory - always curious, always inquisitive, and a...